This morning I headed off to Kohls at 7:15am. A crazy time to be shopping, sort of. They were having a huge sale. They have lots of sales, but I had a $10 off coupon, a 15% off (in addition to sale prices) coupon, and my money from the consignment sale to spend. About $30. I knew it would still take a miracle to find upgrades to my wardrobe for that much but I knew from past experience God would show me exactly the best items to get.
I looked though the racks, praying as I put my hands on items I liked, I dismissed many, put a few in the basket to try on, and worked my way through the "womens" department. I LONG to shop in the "regular" section.
But for now, I will tell you about what it was like to try on clothes.
I knew that I wasn't going to buy a single 3x item. It was the first time in ages.
When I was flipping through the racks of jeans on sale, I felt like I was supposed to get a size 20. I dismissed it thinking that would be depressing, and picked up the 22s and went to try them and the rest of my stuff on. The jeans fit fine. Nothing exciting. I tried on some shirts, eliminating the ones that were between marginal and awful. But I couldn't shake the feeling I should try the smaller size in the jeans.
Now a note about how I shop. I am not a fan. I like to go in, make a pile of things I am going to try on and then pay for the ones that were great and leave. To get dressed and undressed twice in a store is VERY unusual. But, I couldn't shake the feeling I should try on the smaller size, so I did. They FIT!!
It was great!
The last few weeks I have been working hard at not beating myself to a pulp for not eating right ALL the time. I have written about my struggles with it. I know my body needs quality fuel to do what I am asking it to do - shed the pounds it has been holding onto for the last 18 years and become the athlete I was meant to be. I need much less sugar and I am working the gluten out of my eating habits as well. But it is such a process!
I often feel like I am going two or three steps back for every one step forward I take. Turns out I am making more steps forward than I thought. Amazing!
I want to be perfectly clear here, this is a work God is doing in me. He has told me it is His priority for me to focus on this and He would help me do it. And HE is. As I wrote in my last blog, I am trying to hear "yes", "no", "stop" etc. and for the most part, I have obeyed.
Obeying always blesses us. Always. Today He told me to try on smaller jeans. It took a while but I decided to obey, and the blessing - WOW! They aren't even tight!
I feel energized and ready to obey better this next week. And then, maybe, I will get on the scale! It has been a while for that too. About 3 weeks since I experienced the discouragement I found there.
It appears my kids are healthy (I asked God to make sure they were if He wanted me to keep up this hard work He's asked me to do!), I am getting there, and so this week begins another phase of my workouts. Back to strength training!!