I can honestly say tonight was not my best night with my eating...
After days of the stress of cleaning, purging, staying up late, getting up early, more working around the house, etc, I finally caved under the pressure and exhaustion of the last week. The worst time for me to eat unwisely is when I am tired. I know better, I just had no resistance tonight.
Erik said lets get wings instead of pizza. I picked up an inexpensive pizza for the boys and Erik and I got wings. Not a bad thing. I looked online to see what the calorie count was for how many wings within my range. It was not a problem. Until after dinner when I didn't deliberately choose to toss the kids leftover pizza. I ate half of the slice leftover from Peter and half a bread stick. Then later, because of the aches and pains in my body from a tough week of working out, moving stuff, I heated up another piece of pizza, feeling like, "well, I've pretty much blown it already" and ate it followed by a couple of Tylenol and Ibuprofen.
In The Female Body Breakthrough Rachel Cosgrove talks about being on a journey in your car, the car getting a flat tire and instead of fixing the tire and driving on, you let all the air out of the other tires and sit there and wait for someone to come and get you. If you eat something that is not on your regular healthy plan, then get back on program. Don't continue to eat whatever, until you have another ah-ha moment to get you back on track.
I did that tonight. Let all the air out of my tires. I am not consumed with guilt, but I am sharing this with you to just continue the transparency God has called me to walk out before you during this process.
Tonight, I go to bed early. I am going to pray for all my boys to sleep, and believe God for the rest He knows I need.
Trusting Him again, to provide for what I need.