Sunday, May 16, 2010

Focus... what is mine?

I talked to a friend last night about how hard it is to not obsess about your weight when you are overweight. Of course I know thin people who obsess about their weight too. I figured that is why they are thin - they obsess.

So the question I am posing is what is supposed to be a healthy focus on weight? God made me from a certain gene pool. He designed me in my mother's womb (Psalm 139). He knows every part of me. He also knew that weight would be an issue in my life.

Is it supposed to be my "thorn" like Paul spoke about (Not sure the reference) that I am to accept that His grace is sufficient in my weakness. Well, I am very weak in this area as exposed by the size of my body and the diet I have eaten in the past. Well where is the grace in that? I suppose it comes out in the fact that I have NO medical issues that have arisen from my being what is considered "morbidly obese". It makes me queasy to think about that being a description of me -- ever.

SO, here's the deal. I NEED His grace. It will be sufficient. This journey for me will be a long one. Whether it remains a "thorn" in my flesh to keep me humble like Paul said his was for or whether God will unearth some other malfunction I have later in my life that will be another journey that will require complete submission on my part again...

That brings up another question... what doesn't require "complete" submission to my God. Everything on this journey that I have come across in some way needs to be submitted to God. That is how you keep your Focus on the most important things to Him.

He is asking me to focus during this season of my life on my weight. I am not to obsess on anything but hearing his voice in this season. Yes, no, write, pray. It takes discipline to do that. It is hard. It is good. Today, I recheck my focus. In another 10 minutes I will have to recheck it again... :)

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