So, as I am working through this transformation process I am finding that the rest of my life is going on too.
Some challenges with relationships in my family, the kids waking up in the middle of the night, and the frustration over daily eating out of my comfort zone is getting tiring.
The relationship thing - well, relationships are often challenging aren't they? It is hard to walk through but in the end, you love each other, you want the best for each other and you move on.
The kids waking up in the night. Since I have been training for the triathlon I REALLY need my sleep. Last night one of the boys woke up and couldn't find his favorite blanket. So he came in and woke me up to find it. I was mad. I always tell them to put their blankets on their bed and they were playing and I forgot to check to see if the FAVORITE blanket was in his bed. I looked, found every blanket but the ONE and said, too bad, you should have obeyed Mommy. You will have to look for it tomorrow.
As I am crossly walking out of the room I hear him crying and he tearfully asks me to get him a drink. His brother then asks for one too. As I am commenting unpleasantly under my breath on the way to the sink I hear that still small voice in my head... "Serve him." I reply in my heart, "Ok Lord" and my heart shifted to tenderness toward him. I brought them a glass of water and got my flashlight and began looking for the blanket. I looked upstairs and down and then finally located it the only place under the bed I couldn't reach. The delight in his little voice as I covered him with it was tangible. So precious. He KNEW in that moment that his mommy cared about his heart. It was a reminder of how important it is to OBEY that still small voice!
And as far as eating out of my comfort zone. I am really tired of it. I am working hard to keep a good attitude but it often feels like it takes so much extra energy I wonder if it is worth it. Then I exercise and I can't imagine staying this heavy for the rest of my life. Or I really LOOK in the mirror. Or hold up my underwear and really look at them. Ugh! Reality check!
So, it is all worth it. Every day, get up, spend some time checking in with the Lord on His plan for your day, and move ahead with ALL He has asked you to do knowing that you would not require His presence if you thought you could make it through the day without Him. I need Him. How about you?